In BOB we trust

This and other wonderful essays are on my journal blog - come visit.

The tuesday spiritual group was waiting for what I would say - perhaps, I should not have said anything but it was my turn so I felt as if I should. The group is not very diverse in nature but they are open-minded. I stick out in two ways:
1) I am the youngest member and
2) I am the only MAN.
Thus, I felt it my duty and honor to represent the man's point of view to these spiritual seekers.
The question posed to us was : How do we see God ? Is God an old man in a white robe that has not shaved in years ? Or so you visualize God in a different way ?
Several ladies stated their views and provided the group what I would call 'enlightened' views of God. One lady stated that to define God is to limit God. I agree. But sometimes we need to define God in order to have a focal point for our prayers. The problem is most people don't have a good visual idea of God other than that old guy in a white robe. People need a useful image of God. An image that shows God doing something for you - ie. helping you in your hour (or in my case, years) of need. With that in mind, my mind came up with an image of God in the form of
BOB VILA
Now when I said that to the group, the ladies collectively stated in no uncertain terms that they were not certain who Bob Vila was. I knew that my task was formitable. Most guys, even gay guys, know who Bob Vila is. He is the patron saint of home remodeling; he is the original host of "THIS OLD HOUSE" and he single handedly (editor's note: he did use two hands) created the home fix-it craze that still sweeps america. Bob Vila was immortalized in the sitcom HOME IMPROVEMENT (which starred Tim Allen). Bob Vila is the image of the wise not too old guy who helps you fix up your life for free - and that I thought is what makes a good image (for me) of GOD, someone who'll help you fix up the mess you call your life. For free.
I still think that is a good image for me but the ladies where having none of it, especially Bev who fell asleep when I was talking. Somehow, the discussion changed directions and we began to talk about burial plans. My plan there did not go over too well either. I said I wanted to be left somewhere out in the woods where the wildlife could feed off of me. Bev told me that she would have no part of it and that if I felt like dying I should take myself out into the woods. So this weekend I am heading to the woods hoping that BOB will save my ass.
Frank